Sylar Meets the Devil and all Hell breaks loose
by fenraven
Summary: The title says it all. Rated M for language.


**Sylar Meets the Devil (and all Hell breaks loose)**

Part 1

I came home with blood on my hands and triumph in my heart. I'd found a man who could walk through walls, stalked him and killed him, and now I had his ability.

I was tired and hungry and looking forward to a hot shower. I stopped short just inside the door. He was waiting for me, sitting in the wing chair next to the window, hands folded calmly in his lap. Light from the street lamp outside revealed that he wore some kind of plain white robe, roughly woven, and his long brown hair was parted in the middle and flowed down past his shoulders.

"Who the fuck are you and why are you in my apartment?" I asked, scowling. Flipping on a light, I took a closer look at him. "Jesus..."

"That is correct," he answered. "I am Jesus Christ, and I have come to speak with you about your murderous ways."

I stared at him for a few seconds, and then burst out laughing. "Yeah? Get in line. There's a ton of people who'd like to talk to me about that." Still laughing, I went into the bathroom and washed my hands under steaming hot water, watching as the blood turned pink and swirled down the sink drain. Drying them on a towel, I returned to the living room. My unexpected guest had not moved an inch.

I sat down opposite him in the recliner, popped out the ottoman, and threw my feet up on it. Using my telekinesis, I brought a glass of water in from the kitchen and floated it over in front of him, where it hovered with perfect balance; not one drop spilled.

"Okay, Jesus. Turn that water into wine."

He stared at the floating glass of water for a long moment before saying calmly, "You want me to perform tricks?"

"I want you to prove to me that you are who you say you are, or I'm going to throw your ecumenical ass out of here." As he continued to look at the glass of water, head tilted slightly to one side, I briefly entertained the notion of tipping it over on him...but I resisted if only to see what he'd do next.

His eyes seemed to brighten momentarily, and as I watched, the water in the glass turned ruby red. He sat back with an audible sigh of satisfaction.

Smirking, I thought, _He's one prideful son of a bitch, and isn't Jesus supposed to be above that kind of human vanity?_ I floated the glass back toward me, wrapped a hand around it, and drank.

"A bit austere. Needs to age some before it's table-ready." He didn't even crack a smile. Rolling my eyes, I sent the glass back into the kitchen and heard a soft _clink_ as it settled on the counter. "Of course, that doesn't prove you're the actual Jesus Christ." I created a ball of electrticity in one hand and held it up before him. "I could just as easily claim the title."

His smile was self-indulgent. "I am aware of your special abilities. That is why I am here."

I narrowed my eyes. "Is it Judgment Day?" Shrugging, I added, "I didn't get the notice."

"You have been murdering people in order to acquire their powers. That is bad."

I sent the electricity up to the ceiling and held it there with telekinesis, enjoying the light pattern it made as it slowly spun. "I _am_ bad, and I like it."

"The Heavenly Father is not pleased," he pronounced dolefully, frowning up at the light display. "He wishes you to stop immediately."

I vanished the electrcity and sighed. "You'd better tell Dad to come down here and tell me that himself because I have no plans to stop any time soon."

"I am prepared to take steps," he said quietly.

I pressed my lips together, amused. "Steps?"

He nodded. "If you do not cease to kill immediately, I will vanquish your abilities. You will become average again and live your life in obscurity."

"'Vanquish'?" I threw back my head and laughed. "Good word. But what the hell, are you going around talking to all the serial killers, or am I special?"

A hint of a frown crossed his face. "There have been...rumbles of late about whether or not we exist and the Heavenly Father has decided to take a more proactive stance in such matters. To that end, we are making personal calls on those we feel need it the most." He narrowed his eyes at me. "You stand out even in a crowd of like criminals."

_Hear that, Virginia? I stand out. I'm special. Even Heaven itself has taken note of me._

Before I could phrase a response, there was a flash of light and an explosion of dark smoke in the room. An almost unbearable stench reached my nose and I gagged slightly, waving a hand in front of my face in an attempt to clear it away. Coughing, eyes watering, I squinted through the swirling, oily miasma, catching a glimpse of something red.

"Sorry...sorry..." said the newcomer in a female's dulcet tones. "I _did_ try to tone it down." There was the sound of someone blowing and the room cleared as the smoke disappeared.

She was wearing a beautifully cut red dress that hugged every luscious curve of her tall, slender body. Flaming auburn hair fell down her back to her hips. She had startlingly green eyes and full ripe lips. I think my jaw dropped.

Stepping forward, she held out a hand. "Hi, I'm the Devil. Pleased to finally make your acquaintance."

Part 2

Sitting up a bit straighter, I shook her hand; it was warm and dry and she had a firm grip. "Hi, Devil." I nodded toward the corner chair. "Have you met Jesus?"

She sniffed and rolled her eyes. "More times than I care to remember." Glancing at Jesus, she said, "Hi, Jed. How have ya been?"

Jesus nodded, frowning. "Lily."

_Jed? Lily? What the fuck? _

"How's the old man?" she asked him.

Jesus shrugged. "Same old, same old."

Lily returned her attention to me. "You, Sylar, have been an exceedingly bad boy...and I love it." She broke out in a huge grin. "Keep up the good work. That kill tonight?" She kissed the tips of her fingers in a well-known Italian gesture. "Magnificent. I loved how you made him beg for his life and then took it anyway."

I bloomed under her praise. "Thanks. I've spent some time developing my technique."

She nodded, still smiling. "I can tell, and it works for you, it really does."

"Why are you here?" Jesus asked her. "I was just having a conversation with Sylar."

"You know the rules, Jed. Fair and equal representation. If you're going to try to convince him he needs to follow the golden path of sweetness and light, I'm allowed to present my side of things." Glancing at me, she added _soto_ voice, "He's always sneaking around like this, breaking the rules, trying to one-up me."

"I don't want either one of you here," I state. "I'm perfectly happy with who I am. Neither of you are getting a piece of me." When Lily started to move toward me with a big smile on her face, I held up a hand to halt her. "That's close enough."

She stopped, pouting. "Hon, I'm on _your_ side, and whether you realize it or not, Jed and I each have a piece of you. We're just discussing terms."

I snorted. "This isn't another Devil and Daniel Webster, is it? Because I don't roll that way, and by the way, Lily, where's the pitchfork and horns? You look like a fucking stripper." I said this last with an appreciative chuckle.

She shrugged and perched on the couch arm. "I can look any way I like and I figured you'd appreciate this presentation rather than something more biblical. I'm right, aren't I?"

Yeah, she was right but I merely frowned and bit my tongue. No sense giving her any more ammunition. "Guys, it's been a long evening. I'm tired. I want a shower and my bed, so get on with it or get the fuck out."

They looked at each other for a long moment and then Jesus said, "Do you really want him, Lily? I think it would take a lot for me to turn him back into someone good. He may not be worth the effort."

She raised an eyebrow in surprise. "You'd give him up, just like that? Because if you could turn him back, he'd be great advertising for Dad and the biz."

Amused, I listened to this exchange, wondering if I was in some kind of kill-euphoria induced dream. To find out, I surreptitiously gave myself a hard pinch on the arm. It hurt, so I figured I was awake. I rose from my chair and stretched. "Tell you what, I'm going into the bedroom now so why don't you guys just continue on without me."

Next thing I knew, I was slammed back down in the chair, held there by someone's telekinesis. I glared at them. They looked so self-satisfied, I figured they'd both done it. "All right. You've got my attention." Assholes. "But let me say: I'm my own person first, as always."

"That is not in dispute," Jesus pointed out, slightly exasperated. "It's your soul we are fighting over, nothing less."

I rolled my eyes, the only part of me that that was still capable of movement. "Take it. What the hell do I care about that when I'm dead?"

"You can't do that!" Lily proclaimed. "Proper procedure has to be followed before a soul can be allocated up or down." She gave me a pointed look. "Also, the state of the soul at death must be considered. So far, yours is looking very black indeed, which means you're going to be mine."

"So what does that mean exactly? Belonging to you as opposed to him?" I tried to wiggle a finger and couldn't. "Are you going to release me one of these days?" They did so instantly and I sighed as the invisible bonds vanished. Stretching out my legs, I crossed them at the ankle and waited for her reply.

"A life of servitude to me and anyone else I make your master." She paced a bit, being sure to keep her distance from me. "However, I've been so impressed with what you've accomplished here so far that I'm tempted to keep you as a personal playmate. How does that sound?"

Shrugging, I said, "I don't know. What does that mean?"

"You will wait on me through eternity, fulfilling my every need and desire, doing as I command every minute of every day until the universe implodes."

"That's a pretty long time," I observed. I turned to Jesus. "What are you offering?"

"Clouds, cupids, streets made of gold, absence of pain and strife...the usual."

I pretended to consider. "I don't like either option, and you _do_ know I can't die, right? So your being here at all is a waste of everyone's time."

A scroll appeared in Lily's hands, which she unrolled and searched with her eyes. "Yes, here it is: Regeneration. But it wears out eventually and you _will_ die, Sylar."

Well, shit, that wasn't good news. Scowling, I stared at her. "Do not want."

The scroll vanished. "I don't really care what you want, and neither does Jed. We've run things around here for a very long time and no upstart serial killer, no matter how gorgeous and sexy, is going to change the status quo. Stay evil and I get you. Decide to be good and you go to Jed. I suggest you cast your lot with me; Heaven is boring. You'd go mad there within a week."

I figured I'd go crazy in either place. I decided I was going to live forever, whatever the hell it said on her scroll.

It suddenly occurred to me that maybe my powers were equal to or greater than theirs. Maybe the time for gods and demons was over and humans were on the verge of becoming powerful in their own right. Maybe it was time for specials to start kicking some iconic ass.

Part 3

Almost casually, I raised both arms and waved my hands at them; using telekinesis, I pinned Jesus into his chair and threw Lily up against the far wall. The looks on their faces were so comical, I laughed out loud. "I think the terms just changed."

"You are making a grave mistake," Lily spat out, pinned to the wall two feet above the floor, hands and legs outstretched.

Jesus, in his chair, said nothing. He merely watched me with steady eyes.

"Am I?" Moving Lily out into the room, I spun her like a top, my hand making circles in the air, and then slammed her back up against the wall. "Is it possible you may have underestimated my abilities? Things have changed since you were at the height of your power. I'm going to take a wild stab in the dark and suggest that as more and more people have turned away from you both, you've become weaker and weaker, so fragile in fact that a special like me can work his will on you."

Something flickered in Jesus' eyes and I knew I was right. They were over, done; take them off the grill and serve them with corn on the cob. It had taken both of them combined to nail me to my chair. Alone, they could not stand against me. Calling up my power of electricity, I let them have a solid barrage of it, maintaining it for a good 20 seconds before letting it fade.

"Had enough? Because I haven't even broken a sweat yet."

"Cease!" Jesus bit out, jerking in his chair as I moved a finger up and down. "You've made your point."

Being careful to keep them under my control, I leaned back in the chair and smiled. "You no longer have dominion over me. I'll live as I choose, and if—when—I die, I'll make my own choices then, too."

At that moment, an ear-splitting BOOM exploded in the room, accompanied by a flash of light so bright, I averted my eyes.

"ENOUGH!" someone intoned in a deep voice that reverberated through the room.

Lily rolled her eyes and Jesus said to me, "You're going to get it now."

I raised an eyebrow at them. "What?"

She snorted. "It's Jed's old man, and when he makes an appearance…so to speak…it's never pleasant."

_God came to see me? Wow._ I sat up a bit straighter and looked around, but other than Lily, Jesus, and me, there was no one in the room.

"So where the fuck is he?"

"ASSHOLE! WHY WOULD I BOTHER TO MANIFEST FOR A PIP SQUEAK LIKE YOU?"

I grinned a little. "No need to get personal." Pause. "Asshole."

Light exploded in every corner of the room and I figured this was God having a tantrum. I waited it out, and when it faded, produced a similar display. Lily and Jed looked at each other and their expressions said it all: _What an idiot._

Just as I was about to say something, I felt an invisible hand lift me out of the chair and pitch me into the wall. Hard. Bits of plaster rained down. Grunting, I said, "Ouch. That hurt."

"THEY MAY NOT HAVE THE POWER TO DEAL WITH YOU, BUT I DO!"

I almost made a smart remark but incredibly, exhibited unbelievable intelligence by refraining from doing so. I clamped my mouth shut and waited for what might happen next. Besides, I couldn't move; he had me pinned to the wall as effectively as I's previously had control over Lily and Jed.

"YOU ARE NOT A GOD AND NEVER WILL BE. I'M TIRED OF DEALING WITH UPSTART HUMANS LIKE YOU WHO THINK THEY CAN CALL THE SHOTS BECAUSE THEY HAVE A FEW PIDDLY ABILITIES."

Lily was shaking her head. "Uh-oh."

I started to feel tendrils of fear licking around my heart. "What?"

Jesus smiled a little. "Nice knowing you."

"AS LONG AS I EXIST, A SENSE OF ORDER WILL BE MAINTAINED. THAT IS ALL."

While his last words still echoed in the room, an invisible hand reached inside me, grabbed a handful of my guts, and yanked them out. A pain that was not quite physical exploded in my head and I squeezed my eyes shut against it.

"YOU'RE OVER, DONE. I'M GOING TO SERVE YOU WITH AN EAR OF GRILLED CORN."

_What the fuck, he'd read my thoughts? Huh. He's God, of course he did._ "What does that mean?"

His giant laugh made the pictures on the wall shake. "YOU'LL SEE."

There was another huge BOOM and blinding flash of light, and I slid to the floor as I was released. No one said anything for a while; we just gave each other uncertain looks and waited.

When nothing else occurred, we sort of dusted ourselves off and took stock. Before they could do anything to me, I tried to lock them down again…and nothing happened. I tried to conjure electricity and produced nothing but a slight breeze from moving my hand around.

"Shit! He took my abilities away."

Lily and Jed perked up. "I warned you," she said while Jesus merely nodded.

I gave them a look from under the brows. "Big mistake. This will only force me to murder a bunch of specials to replace them."

Jed shook his head. "That cannot be allowed…"

I suddenly felt a million fire knives being thrust through my body. Screaming, I tried to turn away, hunch down, protect myself but still they kept coming….

On Level 5, Bennett stopped next to Sylar's cell, waiting for the med tech to exit. Through the viewing window, he saw Sylar twitching and jerking against the straps that held him securely to the gurney.

"What's wrong with him?" Bennett asked the tech.

"The drug cocktail he's on makes him hallucinate," the tech said.

Bennett frowned. "Is he sleeping or awake?"

Shrugging, the tech made sure the door behind him had locked; where the serial killer was concerned, every security measure was followed to the letter. "Hard to tell sometimes."

Angela walked up beside Bennett. "Take him off those drugs, Noah. I want to speak with him and I want him in his right mind when I do so."

"Do you think that's wise, Angela?"

She gazed at Sylar through the window, observing him dispassionately. "I have a little job for Mr Gray…"

The End


End file.
